Bin Laden Video: “Chomsky is my favorite bitch”- and “America will be taxfree under Islam”

by sheikyermami on September 7, 2007

osama1.jpg

“I invite you to embrace Islam”

Bin Laden also suggests the Jews could have avoided the Holocaust if they had put themselves under the protection of Muslims and indicates that the mujahadeen are now determining U.S. policy.

An offer you can’t refuse; America’s Dhimmicritters are ‘reverting’ in droves:

ABC News’ Jonathan Karl Reports: ABC News has obtained a transcript of the latest taped message from Osama bin Laden.

Sources tell ABC News the tape is approximately 30 minutes long, and does not contain overt threats to the United States.

According to the transcript bin Laden opens with “praise to Allah” and his “law of retaliation” — “an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth and the killer is killed.”

He also speaks to recent issues grabbing headlines in the United States, referring to “the reeling of many of you under the burden of interest-related debts, insane taxes and real estate mortgages; global warming and its woes…”

“To conclude,” bin Laden says, “I invite you to embrace Islam.” He goes on to say: “There are no taxes in Islam, but rather there is a limited Zakaat [alms] totaling 2.5 percent.”

What? No Taxes? Where do I sign up?

Link

Only his hairdresser knows for sure

Characteristically, no one is picking up on the significance of the dye job. The Shafi’i school of Islamic jurisprudence forbids men and women to dye their hair black “except when the intention is jihad…as a show of strength to unbelievers” (‘Umdat al-Salik e.4.4). Sheikh Yusuf al-Qaradawi, in his The Lawful and the Prohibited in Islam, says essentially the same thing: “Some of the early Muslims, including some sahabah [companions of Muhammad] such as Sa’d ibn Abi Waqqas, ‘Uqbah ibn ‘Amr, al-Hassan, al-Hussein, Jarir, and others permitted the use of black dye. Some scholars, on the other hand, do not consider the use of black dye as permissible except during time of war, when the enemy might be impressed by the fact that all the soldiers of the Muslim army look young.”

Spencer: I am not impressed. I think it makes him look like an aging lounge lizard. But the belligerent overtones should not be overlooked.

*

Osama’s invitation to Islam

“I invite you to embrace Islam,” says Osama, and yes, that is a prerequisite for an observant Muslim before he can commit an act of violence against an unbeliever.

Muhammad directs Muslims to issue this invitation first, and if they refuse, to invite non-Muslims to enter the Islamic social order as second-class dhimmis, and if they refuse both, to go to war with them:

Fight in the name of Allah and in the way of Allah. Fight against those who disbelieve in Allah. Make a holy war, do not embezzle the spoils; do not break your pledge; and do not mutilate (the dead) bodies; do not kill the children. When you meet your enemies who are polytheists, invite them to three courses of action. If they respond to any one of these, you also accept it and withold yourself from doing them any harm. Invite them to (accept) Islam; if they respond to you, accept it from them and desist from fighting against them….If they refuse to accept Islam, demand from them the Jizya. If they agree to pay, accept it from them and hold off your hands. If they refuse to pay the tax, seek Allah’s help and fight them. (Sahih Muslim 4294)
No one is noting that Osama, like Adam Gadahn last year, accompanies this invitation with unfavorable comparisons of Christianity and Judeo-Christian Western culture to Islam, and an appeal based on the Qur’an’s presentation of Jesus as a Muslim prophet…

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Too small? Click hereThis is a satirical website. None of what you read here has anything to do with Islam, because Islam is a Religion of Peace. Everybody knows that good Muslims never do the things they do, (because Allah does it for them, Quran 8:12) and we know that only our misperceptions, ignorance and stereotyping of Islam makes Muslims chop off heads, kill and rape women and children, bomb subways, buses, nightclubs and fly jets into buildings. If it wasn't for the media and da Jooozzz, we wouldn't even know its happening.We welcome open, honest, thoughtful, and vigorous discussion in the comments threads, so do yourself a favour and don't accuse us of being 'haters' because we are loving, tolerant people. Don't curse us, don't threaten us with death or hellfire, and don't accuse us of being "just like the terrorists" because we don't do to Muslims what they do to us or to themselves. Yes, we know that only idiots oppose Islam and sensible people submit, but  you should know that we are ignorant bigots, hypocrites and Islamophobes, and we prefer to remain that way...But since you are forcing yourselves (and your abhorrent belief-system on us) we will defend ourselves, because we must. Avoid tu quoque and ad hominem attacks. If you annoy us, you will be banned and your posts summarily deleted.Try to add to the discussion, don't try to sell snake oil, don't try to cover us with Islamic shrouds of kitman and taqiyya, write in English, try to tell the truth, (we know that's hard for you because you are all pathological liars) but the truth will set you free, try it!One more thing: don't think you can post here under multiple monikers. You will quickly be disappeared! The same goes for trufers and conspiracy kooks: you get one chance, one time. Blow it out of your ass if you must; put your stupidity on display.But you won't be back, trust me on that.Take a deep breath before you post, try to make some sense, do not just vent, do not make a fool of yourself and if you prove us wrong you can earn 10 Islamic dollars for your piggy bank. Deal?

{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

R_not September 7, 2007 at 7:46 pm

Yeah, UBL wants us all to convert and the only ones who will pay the tax are the dhimmi. (dhummy) That has been that way since mohammed figured out that leaving a few dhimmi around was sort of nice – they did his dirty jobs and paid him money while the muslims could use them as dogs to kick around.

Well, I would prefer to pay taxes and have all muslims out of all of our faces forever.

So, is that why UBL dyed his hairs on his head and face? To make himself look badder?! Laughing my donkey off! He looks like an old man who dyed his hair. When UBL gets a spine as does some fighting as do his followers – maybe then I might look at him differently. He left the mujahadeen when they were fighting the Russians because he didn’t like fighting then. I would bet one of his family members is putting his behind on easy street too. There are just too many of them to not figure out that he is getting money from them to sustain himself and all his wives and kids.

ISLAMSFORLOSERS September 8, 2007 at 12:25 am

After reading the text of Bin Loser’s latest fireside chat I thought he had the aid of a leftist conspiracy theorist in writing this stuff. If Islam was truly as peaceful and economically wonderful as Bin Loser says then I would have moved to the ummah long ago and paid homage to the meteorite as a happy convert. But alas, when I look at the ummah I see economic distress, filth, violence, disease, etc. Not exactly my idea of paradise. Thanks big O, but I’ll stick with where I am, even if I am taxed to death. At least some of the money is going to a good cause-trying to make you the object of lust for 72 virgins.

As for that dye job, I wonder if he’s dyed the hair elsewhere on his body. Perhaps we’ll find out some day-string him up upside down and naked. I could use a laugh.

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