Moe’s Jihad News

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Too small? Click here This is a satirical website. None of what you read here has anything to do with Islam, because Islam is a Religion of Peace. Everybody knows that good Muslims never do the things they do, (because Allah does it for them, Quran 8:12) and we know that only our misperceptions, ignorance and stereotyping of Islam makes Muslims chop off heads, kill and rape women and children, bomb subways, buses, nightclubs and fly jets into buildings. If it wasn't for the media and da Jooozzz, we wouldn't even know its happening. We welcome open, honest, thoughtful, and vigorous discussion in the comments threads, so do yourself a favour and don't accuse us of being 'haters' because we are loving, tolerant people. Don't curse us, don't threaten us with death or hellfire, and don't accuse us of being "just like the terrorists" because we don't do to Muslims what they do to us or to themselves. Yes, we know that only idiots oppose Islam and sensible people submit, but  you should know that we are ignorant bigots, hypocrites and Islamophobes, and we prefer to remain that way... But since you are forcing yourselves (and your abhorrent belief-system on us) we will defend ourselves, because we must. Avoid tu quoque and ad hominem attacks. Don't bother with circular reasoning either, we been there, done it.  If you annoy us, you will be banned and your posts summarily deleted. Try to add to the discussion, don't try to sell snake oil, don't try to cover us with Islamic shrouds of kitman and taqiyya, don't bother with da'awa, (we've heard it before) don't spam us with long pieces of cut & paste, write in English, try to tell the truth, (we know that's hard for you because you are all pathological liars) but the truth will set you free, try it! One more thing: don't think you can post here under multiple monikers. You will quickly be disappeared! The same goes for trufers and conspiracy kooks: you get one chance, one time. Blow it out of your ass if you must; put your stupidity on display. But you won't be back, trust me on that. Take a deep breath before you post, try to make some sense, do not just vent, do not make a fool of yourself and if you prove us wrong you can earn 10 Islamic dollars for your piggy bank. Deal?

Doctor Koolaid August 15, 2009 at 3:13 am

Report: Suicide Bomber From Salafi Jihadist Group Detonated Himself in Middle of Hamas Military Squad….

http://www.weaselzippers.net/blog/2009/08/report-suicide-bomber-from-salafi-jihadist-group-detonated-himself-in-middle-of-hamas-military-squad.html

We need more like that!

Doctor Koolaid August 15, 2009 at 3:16 am

Here’s a hero for ya:

British sniper describes moment he shot Taliban commander… from TWO KILOMETRES away

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1206553/British-sniper-tells-moment-shot-Taliban-commander–TWO-KILOMETRES-away.html

Nick August 15, 2009 at 4:07 am

The Black Watch!

Mullah Lodabullah August 15, 2009 at 5:22 am

* Chicago Muslim charged with terrorism hoax

“He was a good boy”
“We saw him at the mosque once or twice, but he wasn’t a part of it”
“We are shocked, shocked!”
“He thought it was a role-playing game, and didn’t know it was illegal”

and if all else fails

“He had a history of mental illness”

persikas August 15, 2009 at 10:03 am

All this muslim violence !
Birmingham UK muslims beating up locals doesn’t seem so bad ( I’m not grateful they ‘only’ beat up the locals – the muslim rioters should have been shot ) compared to
the burning of house with Christians inside in pakistan .
But how long before that kind of violence comes to UK ?

dumbledoresarmy August 15, 2009 at 9:07 pm

Re the two news stories from the Philippines. First of all: my condolences to any Filipino non-Muslim who may be reading this. Your brave soldiers are on one of the major battlefronts of the Third Jihad – that is, the third attempt by the Muslim Mob, or Ummah, to conquer the world. The Muslims in the Philippines do not just want a *part* of the Philippines; if they are given control of Mindanao and other southern Islands for an Islamic state, they will treat all non-Muslims within that area, like dirt; and they will use that state as a base from which to attack the rest of the Philippines…next stop Manila. Islam drives them to dream of conquering *all* of the Philippines and subjecting you all to the hell on earth that is sharia…polygamy, slavery and brutality. Your soldiers stand in the way of that infernal goal. May the non-Muslim Filipinos prevail.

Second: as I read those two reports, how I wished that Australian soldiers were OUT of Afghanistan – where they are totally wasting their time in a sharia-soaked hellpit where the local people hate them – and in the Philippines instead, helping our Catholic Filipino regional neighbours to clean out nests of jihadi gangsters.

Final thought: longterm, if Filipino non-Muslims desire to live in peace without the continual threat of bombings, kidnappings, murders, and Muslim raiders charging out of the jungle to raze and pillage Christian villages, then there is nothing for it but to flatten every mosque in the Philippines, and evict into Indonesia every Muslim who is not willing to renounce Islam. And then the border with Indonesia and Malaysia will have to be continually defended. It will take a will of iron.

Solkhar August 15, 2009 at 9:57 pm

Spoken with good Catholic zeal in defiance of His Holiness the Pope and the Cardinal in Manila, let alone the aspirations of the rebel movement in Mindanao.

Though the rebels are certainly linked with radical Islamists and there are more “tit” than “tat” in the destruction of Christian villages compared to Muslim Villages on that Island, both happens.

What is most interesting is that the chief of the Armed Forces though recognizing the on-going conflict on the Island, has correctly stated that the greatest danger to the Philipines still rests withe communist-based insurection and terrorism from the north of the Philipines and not the Islamists that stick the the island of Mindanao, which confirms that is their goal. That rebellion is still technically a poltical movement unlike what this zealot thinks.

A last comment, the real war is in Afghanistan and in correcting the imbalance and stupid level of tolerance in Europe for radical communities. Fix both and everything will change.

Realist August 16, 2009 at 5:06 am

When there is no one else to kill Mohammedans kill each other its what they do and its waht Islam is a HATE AND DEATH CUlT. and no taqqiya BS from Solkhar who does not even know if the Krap Kran is a 7th Century HISTORY book or the ‘actual unalterable eternal word of God ‘ can change that. Islam is as Islam does.