Fear not, conservatives, tell it like it is
Conspiracy theories are taking hold of Western civilisation. Angry, middle-aged feminists — beloved by journalists, hated by the rest of us for their hectoring tone and perhaps for the stench of cat urine and disappointment that follows them everywhere — have persuaded our credulous, virtue-signalling elites of a number of things that are simply not true.
There is no “rape culture” on college campuses. That doesn’t mean rape doesn’t happen or that it isn’t awful. But rape rates have been falling all over the West for decades.
There is no “gender pay gap”. In almost no organisations are women paid less than men for the same work. When stories do come out about pay gaps, they are almost exclusively in left-wing organisations, such as Gawker, the BBC and Hillary Clinton’s election team. Even a — female — Harvard economist couldn’t prove the existence of a wage gap when she tried last year.
Instead of celebrating our society becoming more enlightened and men learning to respect women and women having equal access to education and pay, the bitter, man-hating lesbians of gender studies departments concoct scare stories to terrify young girls.
We’ve got to a point where citing studies and questioning facts is enough to get you blacklisted from media, academe and the entertainment industry. I live in America, where the touchiest subject has always been race. Liberals have been calling conservatives racist for decades to shut down debate, but recently they have stepped up their assaults.
They don’t call us racist any more. They call us “white supremacists” or “neo-Nazis”. Hilariously, they even do it to me, despite the fact I have a black husband and have never uttered a racist sentence in my life.
If you bring any of this up, you’ll be called a misogynist, a sexist, a racist and perhaps something worse. Calling people names has become a substitute for argument for the bossy left-wingers who tell us lies while lecturing us about how we should live. Instead of persuading us (which they can’t on the facts), they bully, manipulate and intimidate us into pretending we agree with them. Then they shriek in horror when we turn around and vote for Brexit or Donald Trump, just to spite them.
You’ve probably encountered something similar in your own life. Being told something you know isn’t true. Perhaps you’ve had to sit through “consent classes” at university, or mandatory “equality and diversity training” at your job. These compulsory finger-wagging sessions sound innocuous, but they are not. They’re designed to scare you into agreeing with far-left political positions.
This month, a Cato Institute study revealed that 75 per cent of conservatives were afraid to express their opinions in public. You don’t need to be afraid. These people have only the power you give them.
The tide is turning, and the era of social justice is coming to an end. All we defenders of common sense have to do is press home our advantage. Conservatism and libertarianism need an injection of good humour and mischief. So grow a spine, and grow a sense of humour. Australia, of all places, is not lacking in either courage or comedy.
The reason I describe all feminists as bitter single lesbians and left-wing journalists as soy-fed beta male cuckolds isn’t just because it’s true — it’s because they have been hurling out insults for three decades at the rest of us. Frankly, they can handle a taste of their own medicine.
You don’t have to be as sassy or insolent as I am. It’s probably not a great idea to call your vice-president of human resources a fat, miserable social justice loser who just wants to make everyone else as miserable as she is.
But you can laugh. Laugh heartily. No one can resist the truth wrapped in a good joke, and ridicule is your most powerful weapon against the nannies and scolds of the left. And let’s face it, the left is hilarious, from the mannish bores on TV squealing about perceived offences to the feral, unemployed protesters who assemble at the drop of a hat to howl and moan and generally make asses out of themselves.
Don’t be scared when pea-brained politicians from the Greens call your favourite journalist a “pedophile apologist” or “white supremacist” when you know it isn’t true. They’re just trying to make you afraid. Like all bullies, they are cowards. If you stand up to them, they will fold quickly.
Laugh, and keep laughing, and between your uncontrollable fits of giggles at the comical excesses and hypocrisies of the progressive left, keep spitting facts, data and logic. If you can be a happy warrior instead of the usual fulminating Fox News host, if you can be charming, likeable, attractive, funny and modest — like me — you will win.
Milo Yiannopoulos is an award-winning journalist and a New York Times bestselling author.