History: The Reply of the Zaporozhian Cossacks

by Christina McIntosh

Interlude, After London and St Petersburg. The Legendary Reply of the Zaporozhian Cossacks

In the wake of the latest Muslim jihad atrocity perpetrated against unarmed civilians in an infidel country – I refer to the attack on the St Petersburg subway – I observe, as per our Aussie ABC, the now-familiar ritual of the laying of piles of flowers and lighting of little candles (which you will see if you click on the link provided).

“Residents have been bringing flowers to the stations near where the blast occurred.  Every corner and window-sill at the ornate Soviet-built Sennaya Square station on Tuesday was covered with red and white carnations”.

Flowers, tears and candles, weeping and praying, in response to extravagant ritualistic Mohammedan human sacrifice of hapless infidels, carried out over and over and over and over again, in the First World, in the Third World, against Jews, Christians, Hindus, Buddhists, atheists (not to mention, of course, the neverending butcheries of the ‘internal struggle’ indulged in within the dar al Islam).

As for me… once, just once, after one of these bloody Mohammedan butcheries carried out on Infidel soil, in the heart of the lands of the non-Muslims, I’d like to see someoneresponding a bit more in the spirit of the legendary Reply of the Zaporozhian Cossacks to Sultan Mehmet IV’s demand that they Submit.


As the story goes, the said Cossacks had defeated the Muslim Ottoman forces in battle.  Mehmed nevertheless imperiously demanded that the – non-Muslim – Cossacks submit to Muslim Turkish rule.  The Cossacks, led by Ivan Sirko, responded with a blisteringly defiant letter laced with ribald insults.

According to the translation of the letter exchange provided by wikipedia (which has its uses, from time to time), the Sultan (at that time, of course, styled Caliph of all Muslims) wrote the following:

“Sultan Mehmed IV to the Zaporozhian Cossacks:

“As the Sultan; son of Muhammad; brother of the sun and moon; grandson and viceroy of God; ruler of the kingdoms of Macedonia, Babylon, Jerusalem, Upper and Lower Egypt; emperor of emperors; sovereign of sovereigns; extraordinary knight, never defeated; steadfast guardian of the tomb of Jesus Christ (!!!??? – CM); trustee chosen by God Himself; the hope and comfort of Muslims; confounder and great defender of Christians  (!!! – CM) – I command you, the Zaporogian Cossacks, to submit to me voluntarily and without any resistance, and to desist from troubling me with your attacks. – Turkish Sultan Mehmed IV.”

To which display of overweening Mohammedan pomposity and demand for abject Submission the Cossacks reply, thus (WARNING: this translation does not obscure the obscenities of the original).

“Zaporozhian Cossacks to the Turkish Sultan!

“O sultan, Turkish devil and damned devil’s kith and kin, secretary to Lucifer himself.  What the devil kind of knight are thou, that canst not slay a hedgehog with your naked arse?  The devil shits, and your army eats.

“Thou shallt not, thou son of a whore, make subjects of Christian sons; we have no fear of your army, by land and by sea we will battle with thee, f*ck thy mother.

“Thou Babylonian scullion, Macedonian wheelwright, brewer of Jerusalem, goat-f*cker of Alexandria, swineherd of Greater and Lesser Egypt, pig of Armenia, Podolian thief, catamiteof Tartary, hangman of Kamyanets, and fool of all the world and underworld, an idiot before God, grandson of the Serpent, and the crick in our d*ck.  Pig’s snout, mare’s arse, slaughterhouse cur, unchristened brow, screw thine own mother!

“So the Zaporozhians declare, you lowlife.

“You won’t even be herding pigs for the Christians.

“Now we’ll conclude, for we don’t know the date and don’t own a calendar; the moon’s in the sky, the year with the Lord, the day’s the same over here as it is over there; for this kiss our *rse!”

“Koshovyi otaman Ivan Sirko, with the whole Zaporozhian host.”

2 thoughts on “History: The Reply of the Zaporozhian Cossacks”

  1. Good job Christina. This was wonderful to read. A time when men were men. I love those Zaporozhians.

Comments are closed.